Thursday, June 4, 2020

Black Lives Matter


I have been reflecting a lot on my privilege - Indian-American, Engineer, Male
I yet don't have anything cogent to add to the dialog except for the visceral feeling that what happened is wrong, how did we enshrine this as a society - there are many answers, protest to change this system.
Some reflections,

  • I am a privileged man– blessed in life with access to good education, access to business opportunities. I have had steady work– I have been fortunate to have been employed at Google for the past ten years. But many of these things were only made possible.
Thank you, Civil rights movement. ⚑
  • Without that I would have never even been able to come to America, to have those business opportunities, to receive the education that I did.
  • In a broad sense, the movement led to where I am today.
  • The issues arising now, with the death of George Floyd, the protests arising from this tragedy – I have only seen this be aggravated through the actions, or rather, inaction of the president. His words show almost complete disregard of black lives, though they are the ones faced with the most adversity
  • Through the words of Trevor Noah, in a recent commentary, I was able to gain greater insight into the feelings behind peoples' actions

Words fail me now - will continue to reflect.
Love all, find that which unites us.

George Floyd's death and the following protest movement feels like a groundswell that i certainly hope will bring about much needed change. Change will be painful, but it is high time.

Saturday, September 29, 2018

Why are you smiling?

Why are you smiling?

Rashid, the driver of the uber asked me this question.
I am content because i got to see my GodUncle smile.
A week ago i got a text message from my Uncle's son, Dr. Sunil -

Dad has inoperable liver cancer, he's got days left!

Yesterday, I got to spend the day with him at home - he's in a lot of pain, managed with some palliative medications.
Not only was he not complaining, he seemed content. This is the Jose Uncle that received me and Sachin 28 years ago into this same home - this was my permanent address for several years in this adopted country, America. He was the one we turned to for counsel and help.
My Appa, sent me off to America with a lot of angst, assured by Jose Uncle
all will be well.
Jose Uncle has been a constant in my life. He's the one to turn to.
Ask Jose Uncle about mortgage - Appa would say
Jose Uncle called me on the eve of my wedding, "Balaji, Do you need money?" 
Matter of fact, practical

And on occasion he's show his super-sensitive side for his friend when he called me to say,
Appa is feeling hurt.
Not a man to waste words - but wlways assured of a laugh from him, a matter of fact pragmatic view of life and simple sensibilities. There are many a times, our conversation would start with Uncle telling me that he'd received a large paycheck for $1748 (number made up) - people's incomes are secret, not for Uncle.
He lived larger than life, by his rules with a caring word for all around him.

Yesterday when i was with him, his neighbors visited with him, and reminisced about all the times they came here to get their dose of laughter from him.
Though in his last days, still coming with that expectation.

His parting words, "Balaji, you know Ananthan and I are best-friends."

I know that and have felt it all my adult life; those words took me to a warm place; i put my head on his chest to let that sink in.

Uncle, you lit up all of our lives and the glow will always warm us.

Uncle's surrounded by family - 2 lovely angels thanks to  Dr. Sunil and his wonderful wife, Huma


Mariamma Aunty is the rock - the matriarch, the steadying hand. Them, operating as a single unit was a thing to marvel and learn from.

Uncle, thank you for everything you taught me by living it - not by lecturing about it. You did well for us.
Be assured, we'll do our part to pay-it-foward

Wednesday, May 21, 2014

Honored to be alive


Accident
I drove my car into a parked truck near my house. It was an unprovoked incident and I was the only one involved. The lift gate of the truck was mangled and the car’s airbags saved me from any substantial injuries.

This happened on Sunday, May 18, 4:30pm Pacific Time, near Redmond Avenue / Cloverhill Drive at San Jose.
highlander-frontcrashed.jpg

Physically I am doing fine, lots of questions to resolve in the mind. I did walk away from the wreck on God given legs and had the presence of mind to call Rohini to take over charge of the situation. She took over from there on and it’s all a blur, i was in my senses, breathing, dazed but not feeling much beyond.

Love
The outpouring of concerns starting from strangers in the neighborhood to immediate family not unexpected, but serve as a reminder for how i am connected. I live a favored life - this incident served as a reminder of that.  Special thanks to the unflinching support from my dear wife, Rohini. I had my 2 eyes, Prajakta and Sujata there to help make me realize what more there is to live for. And at home Appa and Amma who I continue to lean on and make my problems theirs. Someday I might grow up, not today.

Thankful, for the immediately preceding events that afternoon and how they played out; it was entirely within the realm of possibility that Appa or our girls would have been in the car with me. Devastates me to think of the what-if. Writing it down to acknowledge that those thoughts have crossed my mind, not as much to dwell on that or what could have been, etc. Thankful for what was and that’s Providence.

I have several immediate thoughts to correct about myself - including being mindful and being in the moment. This has been a long standing fear that just came to pass. I am fortunate to have walked away whole. I will spend more time contemplating and practice what I have said to many, this is my opportunity to learn about what caused me to be distracted and have the lapse and make modifications to my life.
It is a wake up call.

In conclusion, I am at peace with my Maker and realize that this can happen at the next turn. I feel a sense of gratitude for having escaped this time and hope to make the most of it, God willing.

Thank you,

Sunday, September 8, 2013

A refreshing Alaskan vacation

An Alaskan Vacation

A refreshing break from the norm is a vacation. This particular one, to go to Alaska was Rohini's idea and it was the perfect break and memorable vacation with all 4 of us and Aai included.

Alaska's immensity blew me away, larger than any other in my experience, this Alaskan landscape.
The landscape feels like a living organism, unlike anything i have experienced. The whole landscape goes through a freeze and thaw annually just added to a sense of freshness about everything here.

Summary Trip Report

Period: August 2, 2013 - August 9, 2013

Anchorage

We started our trip in Anchorage with a city trolley tour and checked out a local farmer's/flea market by downtown. It was a center of activity on the weekend.
Visited the place where the formal start of the Iditarod race is at. In the afternoon we picked up our rental Camper - a first  time experience for us. It feels like a Rockstar tour bus (not that i know anything about that either). 
We stocked up on supplies - we were told vegetarian food might be a challenge in this country of caribou and moose meat. 

Anchorage notes
  • 11' fall at Earthquake park; 1964. Only 9 dead at a 9.1 mag earthquake. 
  • Due to the Good Friday holiday the high school game was canceled and the high school was close to ground zero, so a real Good Friday escape.
  • 75 homes totaled, replace with forest. 36 waves rocked the city.
  • Largest number of small engine aircraft. Tundra tires to help landings. 
  • 1 in 52 alaskans are pilots.
  • Chugatch mountains - rain maker mountains.

Denali

Then the camper headed north to Denali National Park. First night experience of daylight until late meant that we were having dinner close to midnight. Helped to have our own kitchen so no time constraints. This was a daily practice for the week we were in this vast land.
Early next morning we got onto a bus tour of the park. This was by a school bus that is the only transport that has permission to enter the park beyond a certain point. The Parks Highway, after a point turns into a 1.5 lane gravel road and  it was best left in the hands of an expert.  The turning point was  Kantishna Road house. The day was a 13 hour bus-ride with a constant supply of beautiful and vast landscape, punctuated by sightings of Grizzlies, Caribou, Reindeer, Moose, Ptarmigan, Eagles, Sheep. 

Denali bus tour notes
Wildlife sitings marked by "+ count"
  • 8/4 6:10am Kantishna wilderness tour by Kantishna Roadhouse
  • Tour guide : Gitte, originally from Denmark and has lived in Alaska for 29 years; raised 4 boys and dogs with Mike from Ohio living as a nomad. Fishing in the summer, homesteading in the winter. The last 11 years serving school buses in the "real world". has seen more wildlife in the years as a driver.
  • Bus left promptly going north from Denali River cabins.
  • It's a beautiful morning, wonderful scenery, mountains towering on all sides and tall trees on the p permafrost, boreal forest, starting at 1500'.
  • Driving between Alaska range - peak mount McKinley (400 million years old) and Outer range (6 million years old). 
  • Dwarf birch with Willows in between at higher elevation; will get to 4000'.
  • Learnt from ranger at Eielson station.,
    • #til eyes in front, hunt; eyes on side, hide. 
  • +2 moose crossed the road @7:06am
  • Savage river check post welcomed by ranger.
  • Sanctuary river 7 cabins
  • Drunken forest due to thermafrost melting makes the boreal trees slanted.
  • Eskimos live on the north coast and migrated east to Greenland
    • ?All.... Indians live inland in the south.
  • +2 golden grizzly bears in the treeless mountain face. @845am
  • Polychrome mountain+ many colours.
  • East fork river
  • +1 Grizzly bear eating berries on the river plains  @900am
  • +1 Golden eagle circling the right side hill @912am
  • +4 Dall sheep on the ridge
  • +1 family of Ptamigens - state bird
  • +1 grizzly bear eating berries
  • +6 caribou up in the mountain 11:01am
  • Mount brook pass to see mount McKinley
  • +1 caribou with antler and we got to see him from both sides of the hill
  • Stop at Eielson, viewing station for mount McKinley and neighbors, north peak 19470' south peak 20320', Harper glacier, mount Brooks, 11940'.
  • Fire smoke up in the hills; Gitte said there's a fire from yesterday and unless it threatens homes/people fires are left to burn out.
  • 1pm stop at Kantishna roadhouuse for lunch and a talk about the Iditarod race. Emit Peters his Dad won the reader in 1975; he now trains dogs from a shelter in Anchorage and then they put them up for a adoption. 
    • His last set of dogs were adopted by a girl from Wasilla who then won the junior Iditarod:)
  • 3pm return on the bus. 
    • There was a flying option costing $225/person.#busisbetter
  • Clear lake first pause for  pictures.
  • +1 reindeer/caribou galloping away; skittish, probably had it's young hunted by a fox/wolf. 
    • Domesticated caribou is called reindeer.
  • +1 caribou, short antler
  • +1 grizzly+1 caribou separated by 100'
    • #til a grizzly eats 85% vegetation, berries, grass, trunk; teeth in the front are for meat, in the back for vegetation.
  • +1 grizzly uphill of +1 caribou; surprisingly just coexisting/ maybe because Sunday is a day of rest!
  • +4 grizzly - one ran across the stream and crossed over the road to get to the other side of the bus. Ranger said the smoke may be bothering the bears, because he saw one running down at 35mph.
  • +1 caribou grazing
  • +1 moose
  • +1 eagle circling the peak
  • +3  mama grizzly and her cubs
  • +1 grizzly climbing up to the ridge
  • +1 caribou crossed the road between 2 buses. Must have come on the road after the previous bus passed. Slowly walked on the road while the buses waited. Then crossed over to stream for a drink and some foraging.
  • +4 moose far out in the pasture feeding and someone said, "I see 5!" @800pm
  • +1 big bull moose right by the road.

A fulfilled 13-hours!

Talkeetna

Next morning we headed south from Denali to Talkeetna - to take a flightseeing trip into Mount Mckinley. There was an optional landing on the glacier that was subject to weather conditions. The aircraft doesn't go into the clouds and it was raining in the mountains. Still the views were spectacular and the pilot's description of the ice fields and learnt that a contiguous ice sheet is a glacier; perhaps an over-simplification, but simply put a contiguous river of ice = glacier.

Talkeetna notes
  • 8/5 5pm McKinley K2 flight seeing
  • Pilot: Rich, recently transplanted from Oregon to Alaska.
  • Flight started from Talkeetna following Ruth glacier in the rain
  • Merging of 2 glaciers, Silver Throne Glacer into Ruth Glacier.
  • There's a lot of ponds and rivers, confluence of 3 at Talkeetna
  • The crevasse can be covered by show and have a 100' fall
  • Possible to do day hikes to the Star Wars Water falls - get air lifted into the glacier sounds like a great outing.
  • Blue water in the cracks due to the rest of the spectrum absorbed by the glacier
  • A fancy formation called the Royal gorge, another Moose's tooth root canal, along the Silver Throne Glacier.
  • Don Sheldon an early glacier explorer has a cabin that was grandfathered into the Denali park; It can be rented but it has a 2 year wait list.
  • Now at 6 million acres of which 1 million is glacier
  • Approaching Espresso pass formed from the Coffee glacier.
  • Frederick Cook's claim of reaching Mckinley was disproven on Fake glacier -  15 miles South of McKinley
  • A few other landmarks along the way, Buck skin glacier, Speak lake

Pallmer

From Talkeetna we went to see the Musk Ox Farm at Pallmer. These ice age beasts are domesticated here for conservation; didn't seem like the domestication served the purpose of re-population in the wild. Didn't get a good sense from the guides of the larger goals that this was meant for. One of the few times in this state that I felt a lack of genuine connection with the land. I can't put my finger on it, perhaps 

Pallmer notes
  • http://muskoxfarm.org/
  • The Musk Ox Farm - Visit: 12850 E Archie Road, Palmer, Alaska
  • email: info@muskoxfarm.org
  • Open 7 days a week from 10:00am-6:00pm.
  • Tours begin every 45 minutes. The last tour departs at 6:00pm.
  • Adult $11/ senior $9 / child 5-17 $5
  • Spiral nasal cavity
  • From the Ice age - 600,000 years in Alaska. By 1865 there were no musk oxen due to being hunted down.
  • 34 were transported from Greenland to create the conservation program
  • There are 5300 wild musk oxen.
  • Nurse only for 2 months
  • Named by themes - this year it is trees
  • Last year it was spice kids - basil, paprika
  • At 3 years old their horn tip is cut and separated by sex.
  • Costs $1323/ox/year 
  • Quiviut is the guard hair that is harvested from the ox; about 3-5 pounds per ox per year.

Seward

The drive from Pallmer to Seward was via Wasilla made famous by Sarah Palin. A stop for gas, and restocking of supplies and we were on our way. A beautiful drive along the water's edge from Anchorage for about 40 miles. Then in through rolling hills 110 miles to Seward. Rainy day visit to Exit Glacier - the hike up it reminded me of Yosemite falls just 100 times more jazzed by the sight of the glacier!

Seward notes
  • 8/6 - Exit Glacier
    • By Car: To get to Exit Glacier, head north from Seward to mile 3.7. The turnoff is nine miles long (half of it's gravel). If you don't have a car in Seward, you can get to Exit Glacier by cab or take a guided tour through Seward Windsong Lodge. A small fee is required for access to Exit Glacier.
  • 8/7 1230 pm Alaska Sea life center 
  • Count and save the Beluga Whales project: http://www.cookinletbelugas.com/
    •  Only 300 left as of 2008; 1300 in the late 1970s got them added to the endangered species list.
  • Stellar Sea lions divide life between land and Sea. In may they come to give birth. It is on the endangered species list.
  • Harbor seals stay close to shore.
  • Glacial melt at millers landing, hose pipe and at mile 76 on the way to Anchorage.
  • 8/8 kenai fjords
  • Godwin glacier used to extend to water's edge about 250 years ago.
  • Entering the Gulf of Alaska from Seward
  • Another glacier.. Alpine glacier before the gulf
  • We see the bear glacier (extension of the Harding ice fields ) as we come out of the resurrection bay. A major sheet of ice that is merges with exit glacier in the back
  • Spirus cove
  • +1 horned puffin - flies very well under water; Comes here for nesting
  • +1 comoran
Free and spectacular 1 mile hike; similar to lower Yosemite falls hike, the glacier coming up in view in 10x more spectacular.

Highlights

Person: Meeting Gitte, an Alaskan pioneer  - was a personal highlight of the trip for me.
Bio: Originally from Denmark, now has lived in Alaska for 29 years; raised 4 boys and dogs with "Mike from Ohio" living as a nomad. Fishing in the summer, homesteading in the winter. The last 11 years serving school buses in the "real world". She said she has seen more wildlife in the years as a drive compared to her 18 years living off the land!
She had a calm and peace about her in that was just enchanting. Unperturbed by the small delays, changes in schedules, truant passengers and constant attention to the wildlife around were what made her be the highlight for me. She was our driver and guide on the road-trip into Denali. And I believe over the course of the day she managed to bring a higher sense of tolerance amongst the 40 odd passengers in the bus. Her singular focus  was on the wildlife and she wove descriptions of her experiences living out away from populated cities, villages.

WildlifeDenali National Park : We encountered over 25 different animals on the trip through Denali,  made this the wildlife highlight of the trip.
Stellar Seals at Aquatic SeaLife center in their graceful agility were simply marvelous.

Scenery: From the Alaskan mountain range our journey took us to the coast on the Kenai Penisula. All along the landscape goes through from swamps to glaciers. The greenery is a constant with an abundance of water in the form of streams, lakes and ponds.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Om Run 2010

in the beginning...

It started out as a brief conversation initiated by Sanjay Bombwal about organizing a run for fund raising.
In the formative stages it was deemed as far-fetched idea by the sounding board. The practical questions were,
  • is running an appealing sport to the Mission's membership?
  • the Mission's membership might be turned off to another fundraiser for the new building?
  • the messaging for fundraising - what is that going to be?
The Om Run journey started thus in late September 2009. 
The initial thinking was to get a team of 50-60 runners, train for a marathon. We figured we'd get 10 volunteers and complete the run. Sanjay had even measured the distance from Sandeepany to the new building and figured it was only short by 3 miles for a half marathon.
What it morphed to become was something larger and wider to follow the guiding principle from Subbu,
must include Bala Vihar children
The planning and the event went through metamorphosis in the time leading up to the final version:
  1. 5K race
  2. 10K race
  3. Walkathon
  4. An all inclusive mela
What came about was that and much more; a grass roots event where the entire membership came out in support of OM Run 2010. There was good food and some wholesome fun to be had to boot.
It got pulled off due to some acrobatics by an amazing team, this was the Team Om Run. This writeup is an acknowledgement and a tip of the hat to this team. As I look back at this period it felt like a long haul; it came together mainly because Team Om Run set a very high bar and put together an immense event.
The efforts with the team began in right earnest during Thanksgiving 2009. The significant turning points of this project from one vantage point;
  1. permits, insurance, locations (Radesh)
  2. pre-marketing and web site (Sriram, Kris)
  3. training (Ganesh, Ranga, Meyyappan)
  4. phone-seva-Om-Run - dial-for-registration - walk the classrooms (Sanjay and Sri)
  5. planning for the event - Walkathon superwoman Kanchana swoops down (Sid and Kalyani)
  6. Om Run 2010 - March 21, 2010 - Gurudev was smiling down on us
  7. Half Marathon at Pescadero, California - April 11, 2010 (Ganesh and Narayanan)
Significant, because each of these had a distinct personality and a  team (sometimes a team of one). It seems like every one of these needed a Hero to see it to completion. Though I have called these out as separate phases, they all did meld together and that's what made Om Run 2010.
The initial phase was convincing the organizing team that this could work - and making it bite sized, at each step of the way. This was exemplified by the milestones,
  • make openid workflow work and open registration
  • get he.net working and registration will work
  • Om Run tshirt; need it as an incentive registration; and it became an icon
  • make sure the training sessions' import is conveyed
  • we need medals now, ok; done
  • timing the race
  • and so on it went. 
by the numbers...
  1. 1647 - online registrations as of close 3/17/20





    1. 157 - as of 2/2/2010
    2. 889 - as of 3/5/2010
  2. +200 - onsite registrations 
  3. 252 - 10K Run/walkers
  4. 588 - 5K Run/walkers
  5. 55 - Half Marathoners 
  6. $115K raised from Om Run 2010
  7. 258+ volunteers 
  8. 700 Gallons of water
  9. 100% fulfilling

the journey

People make a project like this possible.

Sunday, March 1, 2009

2 months into upward looking year, 2009

i know there are all signs of gloom around especially with job losses, home foreclosure, lack of credit [Ajit said Wells Fargo won't budge under 8%], inspite of that it does feel like 2009 is off to a good start.
  • there is a straight talking leader in the white house
  • he's action oriented, not all of his actions are going to be popular
  • fear of bank nationalization - but the tough talk is going to translate to accountability [imho, banks can't be nationalized in the true sense of the word in this country]
  • California has a budget
  • its raining in northern california, yay!
These legislators, congressmen who could only stalemate in recent times are acting. there is hope, i certainly think a lot of moves in the positive direction have to translate to some common good.

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Happy 2009; launching in with great momentum.

Hari Om
Greetings for the new year; feeling good and starting the year with momentum on account of December activities.
Like they say make the best of the changes that come your way and then any change is a always for the best.
The following is an attempt to explain the momentum i am feeling. it was a confluence of a unforeseen set of events, the opportunity
  • December absence of Shrikrishnaji (community outreach leader @ the mission)
  • .... led to my volunteering to step in for homeless sleeping bag and the coats delivery for the winter.
Initially it was intimidating to consider coordinating a set of volunteers for the sleeping bag collection and drop off. It didn't help that we hadn't yet nailed down the supplier for the bags.
And when the volunteers who had signed up were asking for specific dates and times that were yet to be worked out.

Learnings, the experience taught me to focus on the objectives which in this i set as follows,
  1. getting a cost effective deal on the sleeping bags
  2. enrich the volunteering experience for all participants
... the rest as the saying goes falls into place. And by HIS grace and Gurudev's blessings it all worked out. This was a first for me to practice the message, don't get attached to the fruits of your labor, do your duty. There is good in every person that is around us, it is a matter of recognizing that and acknowledging it. it turned out to be an enriching experience.
Once this was set i knew i had to have a 2 pronged approach and wonderfully enough the supplier/recipient lined up so well; in retrospect explaining the cause got the parties helping and interested.
Supplier - Russell, Walmart manager at the San Jose store was a godsend. He was clear from the get go that the price was not negotiable because it is already "our everyday low price" and they indeed were 15$ cheaper than the competition. After getting the price out of the way it was easy to get the focus on quantity and delivery dates. Jimmy, the sporting goods department manager and Russell were so well coordinated and left me with a renewed sense of admiration for organization that works. To top it off the manager also added an extra 12 bags in addition to the 250 that the Mission was paying for.
The volunteer force - the enthusiasm was infectious and responses were all in such a positive vein. i felt enthused and responsible to all of them to make for a positive experience. So in the setup with EHC I was glad to hear their willingness to allow us to be part of the distribution process. this i think was a unique experience for all of the kids and volunteers [mostly bala vihar Mothers]. It gave us the extra moment to dwell on the sorry state of these individuals at the homeless shelter - Kalyani started talking up the folks over there and had identified the need for a bagged lunch drop off that was an unfilled area.
The bagged lunch sewa - the continuing activity as a result of this one coordinated sleeping bag distribution event at the Sunnyvale Armory.
In conclusion, never a dull moment in life, that's the goal for 2009 and beyond. December 2008 was refreshingly a nice launch into activities such as this one in 2009.
Pay forward for a friend and send a smile forward.

With Obama taking the reins in 10 days, there is hope....